


Normal

by Manateequeem



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Cultural norms, Depressed Takumi, Leo is sweet, M/M, Poor Takumi, Self-Hatred, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-04
Updated: 2017-03-04
Packaged: 2018-09-27 22:23:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10054160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Manateequeem/pseuds/Manateequeem
Summary: It wasn’t normal. That’s what he told himself day after day after day. The way that he would stare at the golden haired boy’s back, only to look away when the other turned around, and the way that he would smile whenever he saw the other, even when he was defeated in chess or even shougi, when he would, with anyone else, have had a moody, prickly outburst. It just wasn’t normal.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so it may be meh.

 

 _It wasn’t normal_. That’s what he told himself day after day after day. The way that he would stare at the golden haired boy’s back, only to look away when the other turned around, and the way that he would smile whenever he saw the other, even when he was defeated in chess or even shougi, when he would, with anyone else, have had a moody, prickly outburst.

_It just wasn’t normal._

_It will go away._

_It will._

It never did.

* * *

 

That familiar chime rang out again, and yet no one had picked up.

It rang again. And once more.

  
_Stupid phone._

  
Then there was a knock at the door, and combined with the sound of the phone ringing, that was enough to drive Takumi out of bed and to open the door, but not before stubbing his toe on the side of his bed.

  
“DAMN IT!”

  
A petite girl with strawberry hair coyly pushed the door open a slither and spoke.

  
“Um.. Nii-san, y-you're phone, it-“

  
“It’s ringing. I know.”

  
“Will you...?”

  
Takumi sighed, pushing back his silver masses of hair. _I should really cut this._

  
“I don’t really want to talk to anyone right now. I have to-“

  
_What do I have to do? It’s not like I have a job, I didn’t even check who was ringing..._

  
“Nii-san...”

  
“I-I’ll pick up, if that will stop the ringing.”

  
“If anything is wrong, j-just, know that we are here for you.”

  
“Sakura...”

  
Sakura looked worried, just like she did every time Takumi was like this. He lost all of his energy once their mother had passed away, his grades were dropping and his words didn’t have the usual bite. They were all afraid that one day, his sadness, his depression, it would drive him over the edge and make him try things which they didn’t want to imagine.

  
“J-just don’t try anything that mother wouldn’t be proud of...”

  
And with that, she left as quickly as she came.

  
They thought that the boy's sadness came solely from his mother’s death, but in truth, what would drive him over the edge was his unrequited love for that 'one asshole'.

His phone rang just once more before he picked it up and smashed it on the ground.

* * *

  
He didn’t go to school that day, he didn’t even leave his room, he just became more reliant on his younger sister to leave him meals outside his door.

Never inside.

  
He was so deep into a half-slumber that he didn’t even realise when Leo walked in, carrying several books.

  
“Takumi, are you not feeling well?”

  
He rolled over on his bed to peek at the object of his attraction. His lean form managed to carry the heavy pile of books up the stairs, which Takumi admired him for, and his golden strands were messily held back by a black headband save for his bangs which he had left at the front.

_He won’t ever love me._

  
Takumi sighed and sat up.

  
“That’s the work I missed, huh?”

  
Leo smiled “Yes, you didn’t come in for a week, so I don’t know what else you could expect.”

  
“You could have done it for me, scum.”

  
“Insufferable.”

  
They both laughed, for what once held aggressive intentions were now the equivalent of pet names.

  
_Why am I acting like nothing is wrong, when on the inside, whenever I see him, I don’t know whether my heart is singing or crying._

  
Takumi patted the space next to him on the azure covers of his bed, which Leo happily accepted and sat beside the other boy.

  
“You didn’t pick up my calls earlier, so I began to wonder if everything was okay.”

  
_You act like you care for someone like me, but I know how it is impossible to._

  
There was a quiet ring, which Takumi was sure wasn’t his phone. He gave a silent prayer for his phone which he viciously murdered earlier in the day.

  
“Speaking of phones, Camilla just rang. Give me a moment.”

The blonde walked out the room to attend to his call, leaving Takumi with an aching emptiness within his stomach, and the sudden urge to cry.

  
He was left like that for two minutes before Leo came back.

  
“Ugh, Camilla invited Selena over for the night and Xander and Elise are out of town. I’d rather spend an afternoon with Silas and Corrin, locked in a room than a day with those two, could I stay here? Just for the night?”

  
Takumi wasn’t listening, instead he stared vacantly at Leo, silently admiring him, until he was snapped out of his thoughts.

  
“Are you listening? You’ve been acting odd lately, you aren’t like your normal self.”

  
_Normal._

He knew he wasn’t normal, but hearing that word from the one who he was so deeply in love with only deepened the pain. The pain of knowing that he wasn’t normal, and never was or would be. With his long silver locks and prickly demeanour, and his undying love for the boy before him. Nothing about the Hoshidan boy was right.

  
“Sorry, I was just... Lost in thought is all.”

  
“Alright then, well as I was saying, I refuse to spend the evening alone with Camilla and Selena, so I wanted to ask if I could- you’re doing it again, Takumi.”

  
He wasn’t listening. He clenched his fists and stared down at his feet , as he hugged his knees.

_Normal._

  
“Takumi? Really, you aren’t acting – “

  
_Normal. I know. I’m wear sandals and socks for goodness’ sake. I must seem so strange to you! Just say it! Say that you don’t want to be seen with me! Tell me that you’re leaving and won’t come back! I’m not worth your time!_

  
“You hate me, don’t you?”

  
It was barely above a whisper.

  
“Why wouldn’t you? I’m hideous!”

  
And he began to cry.

  
Leo looked so hurt, and Takumi cried more, for from the sobbing boy’s point of view he was being pitied and was having Leo’s false worries being smeared all over him.

  
"But I’m awful! I know what people say when they see us walking together, they throw their racial slurs at you too, and it hurts! It hurts so much because it is my fault! If I weren’t so different, if I were just-“

  
The Nohrian didn’t feel like he had to say anything, so he just embraced the crying mess, and held him closer than anything else in his life.

  
“ Why are you playing with me like this? Surely you can tell, everyone else already has! I love you so much it hurts, and yet you mock me for it by hugging me and letting me know what I will never have!”

  
The blonde held him closer.

  
“ You don’t need to change yourself. You don’t need to be something you aren’t.”

  
“But I’m not-!”

  
The taller male pressed their lips together and everything that was wrong felt right again.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback would be appreciated. Thanks for reading! :))


End file.
